By Pastor Lawson Perdue

Understanding why forgiveness is important will open the door to God’s favor in your life. Some people don’t see answers to their prayers or experience lack because an unforgiving spirit toward someone gives the enemy of God a stronghold into our lives. The bottom line: forgiveness is commanded throughout the Bible. Ephesians 4:32 says, “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” We have the greatest example of forgiveness in Jesus Christ, who chose to come to earth, die for our sins, and offer us complete forgiveness. We have been forgiven a huge debt by God, so why wouldn’t we forgive others?

Why Is Forgiveness Important in Your Life?

As a pastor, let me answer some of the questions that I have heard about forgiveness.

Why is forgiveness important? Forgiveness reveals God’s true nature of love, “does not keep an account of a wrong suffered” (1 Corinthians 13:5 NASB), and forgiveness through showing us grace and mercy. We receive forgiveness from God, and in turn, we need to forgive others.

Why Is It So Hard to Forgive Someone Who Hurt You?

We are spirit, soul (mind, will, emotions), and body. The soul experiences emotional pain from the offense, a sense of justice that wants the person to pay, and vulnerability of opening yourself up to be hurt again. The good news is that you don’t have to let your soul rule over you; your spirit is forgiven, and with the help of the Holy Spirit in us, we can forgive others.

Is Forgiveness the Same as Forgetting?

When you forgive someone, it doesn’t mean that you give them the same access to you to hurt you again. Forgiveness offers them a chance to change and build trust again. We can choose not to dwell on the hurt, just as Christ removed our sins and remembers them no more (Hebrews 8:12).

What Happens Spiritually When You Forgive?

When you forgive someone, you are operating in love and compassion, just as Jesus did for you!

Can you forgive someone without talking to them?

Matthew 18:15 tells us, “Moreover, if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.” Sometimes it is physically impossible to go and talk with the person, but we certainly have access through our cell phones and emails.

Is it a sin not to forgive?

Sin is missing the mark of God’s standard. Until we get to heaven, we will sin. The important thing to remember is that Jesus paid for ALL sin: past, present, and future. Your eternal destination is based on accepting salvation, not on whether or not you forgave someone.

What is the connection between forgiveness and healing?

Can you heal without forgiving? Even the medical world has numerous studies showing that unforgiveness negatively affects a person’s health. It is God’s will for all to be healed. Our healing doesn’t depend on us—Jesus paid for our healing on the cross when He paid for the forgiveness of our sins (Isaiah 53:5). Both forgiveness and healing show God’s desire to restore. When we walk in forgiveness, we remove a barrier that hinders our faith that God will heal us!

How do I forgive someone who won’t apologize?

We can follow Christ’s example of forgiveness as He hung on the cross and forgave the people who put Him there (Luke 23:34). They certainly didn’t apologize to Him. Remember, we are only responsible for ourselves, not the actions or inactions of others. When we stand before Jesus Christ in eternity, we are only judged for our actions.

How do I forgive repeated offenses?

Forgiving someone repeatedly is not easy in the flesh. In Matthew 18:21–22, Peter asked this same question, and Jesus answered, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” Four hundred and ninety times is a lot of forgiveness in one day, but Jesus was really showing them that unlimited forgiveness should be our standard, just as God has unlimited forgiveness for you (Matthew 18:35).

How Do I Ask God to Help Me Forgive?

The first step toward forgiving is to ask for forgiveness of your sins. Jesus did what you could never do to give you what you could never earn—His grace offers forgiveness of your sins. Once you’ve received forgiveness, you can truly give forgiveness because you’ve received it. Simply read God’s Word, allow the Holy Spirit to guide you, and choose to follow God’s will to forgive!

I hope this has helped you! Feel free to reach out to our prayer line (719-418-4000) and pray with someone about God’s forgiveness or how to forgive others. If you’d like to pray in person, we have prayer ministers who would love to pray with you after each service: on Sundays at 8:30 and 10:30 am, and on Wednesdays at 7:00 pm.